Haven't been feeling the greatest emotionally :(

Well the past couple of days I just felt sooooo anxious, like no matter what I'm doing, I just get all panicy about it. Driving to work, thinking about school.....I really think I have an anxiouty disorder, but feel stupid going to the doctors about it. I just....I don't know.....feel so stressed out all the time and worried, its not cool.

I guess on a good note my new job is going okay. It is super stressful and unless I take a zantax before work I usually cry while I'm there. (See thats what I'm talking about above, thats not normal!) But the people I work with are great, they make me laugh and help me out alot, I really appreciate it! Plus the money is great, I made $140 last night and only worked8 hours. Thats not too shabby! But let me tell you, I've never felt like I've earned every penny before. By the time I get out of work my whole body hurts, and I feel like I'm at or near my breaking point. Damn I need to go see a therapist or something, lol, I just want to feel normal and happy again.

Brett and I are doing pretty well, so thats good. I just wish sometimes he would lend me more positive support. But he's great, I can't wait until we get married, hopefully it won't take him forever to ask me, since we've been together for almost 3 years now. But there's no way I would get married before I'm 21, I think you should be able to legally drink at your wedding, if you can't....it's probobly too early, lol.

Well I guess I'll let you go, I really need a journal again, maybe I'll find an online journal and just keep it private, we'll see. I love you guys!!!